Routines, when made habitual over a period of time, can be powerful environment factors. This is true especially for those rituals that are directed inward and not influenced by the outside world. Whether it is making a cup of tea or playing an instrument. It is not the content of the ritual but the consistency that can have a calming effect and anchor us in the turbulence of emotions and events we may experience.

During that brief reprieve, life is simple again. The one constant in an otherwise uncertain day.

Life does not adhere to a linear principle. Ups and downs don’t come neatly in line nor do they give sufficient buffer for each other to fade away.

So take that walk and if you can make an overdue call all along the way, do it. Have that laugh with a friend and maybe get inspired to start a side project. The blues might come back but they will have a lesser hold.

Get comfortable with positive and negative emotions co-existing. Don’t dismiss the bad but don’t wait for it to vanish without a trace either before seeking out the good. Greet them as familiar co-habitants, one never far from the other.

I am in that stage of life where I am beginning to see loss up close. Friends losing their parents. Colleagues losing their life partners. These events strike close to my heart in a way they didn’t when I was younger. Because these are people who I have travelled with in life.

As long as there is life, there will be death. The concept of our own death is intimidating. But when someone you love dies, that just fills us up with sadness and regrets.

As I grapple with the these emotions, one thought has become clearer. What is grieving but another form of love transformed and living on as memories?

While nothing can make the loss of a loved one easier, this does give a small measure of peace and strength to wade through the grief.

Engagement and connection are two essential requirements for a full life. But when we are down or depressed, it can be hard to take our typical steps to connect with the outside world like calling a friend or going for a walk. At such times when proactive action is difficult, we need alternative options with minimal inertia.

Recently I have found one – listening to podcasts. All it requires is to plug in earphones and hit play on a podcast. As the voices of the host and guest fill my mind and something resonates, it pulls me out of my own looping thoughts and nudges me to meditate on what I am hearing.

This may not be as fulfilling to the soul as talking to a loved one but it fits the need of the hour, giving us the kick start we need to take subsequent bigger strides towards more engagement.

Blame is an expression of control. Sometimes over situations we could have managed better. Sometimes over things which are out of our hands.

In either case, acceptance and compassion are much more effective as first steps that can then lead us to actionable improvements.

Blame, whether it is directed towards self or others, is always destructive in the long term.

We don’t have to win every fight. Only the end goal is important. Never lose sight of the purpose to satisfy temporary ego boosts along the way.

As I gain more experience, one of life’s truths that grows clearer. Any principle, practice or process only changes when someone takes action instead of waiting for the rest of the world to fix it.

Changes are effected, not by the most capable, but by those who care enough to step up.

The question is not “Why me?” The question is “What now?” Because the past is gone and the future is not yet.

– Edith Eger in A Slight Change of Plans

God, I made such a big blunder!

I have made a mistake but it’s a new one. What can I learn from it?

There is a stark difference between the two styles of thinking. The former assigns blame and ends in panic, robbing us of the ability to think about the next step and probably making us defensive in the long run. The latter, on the other hand, views it with self-compassion and identifies an opportunity for growth.

Reframing is a powerful tool. This is just one example of it. It can be perspective-altering. It modifies the lens through which we view the world in a way that can make us more effective and productive.

We probably all know someone who invests more time in trying to appear smart vs gaining real knowledge.

In this iconic clip from the TV show, The Newsroom, on the topic of how knowledge and intelligence were viewed in the past, this is said.

We aspired to intelligence; we didn’t belittle it; it didn’t make us feel inferior.

Knowledge grows or shrinks depending on how we feed it. If we nurture it with curiosity, humility and a growth mindset, it will grow and reap benefits exponentially. Knowledge is one of the few assets that multiplies by sharing. On the other hand, if we browbeat it with fear, arrogance and a know-it-all attitude, it will stagnate away in a corner.

Organisations that consciously encourage the growth and sharing of knowledge freely are the ones armed for the long haul. In Seth Godin’s words, secrets don’t last and when they are eventually figured out, one of the things that will matter is the prevailing culture around knowledge.

Ignorance is an opportunity. After all, if there is nothing more to learn, what’s left to motivate?