Humans are social creatures. We are constantly looking for groups to belong to, call as our own, feel connected with. And this is essential because without social groups – be it family, friends or colleagues – life would be very lonely and meaningless.

But the important question we have to ask ourselves is – at what cost?

The answer to this question will vary from person to person depending on the needs, wants and life experiences of each. But I believe there is one fundamental thing that should definitely not be up for negotiation. And that is fitting in with ourselves.

It is important that I feel comfortable with the person I am now and the person I am becoming as life goes on. Because while we have to move with others a lot, we live with ourselves 100% of our lifetime. And we need to like and love that person first, before anybody else does.

Our definition of self will keep evolving with every day, every new person we meet and every experience we live through. And striking the right balance between our current and our future potential self is an ongoing process. We will not get it right, a lot. But then a little voice inside will speak up when we change against our nature. And that should always be our anchor.